Have you ever had a moment in your life where you stop and think to yourself “that seemed like a total movie moment!” Usually it's the perfect kiss, a comedy of errors, a gunman... You know, things that only happen in the movies. Recently I have had several movie moments, but it's sort of like the same movie moment over and over and over again.
What is that movie moment you ask? Well let me tell you! Have you ever watched Office Space? If you haven't then stop everything and go watch it! It's pretty friggin' awesome. If you have, then do you remember the part in the movie where Milton says “and I could see the squirrels, and they were merry, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much.” This has become my life. I just realized that I enjoy watching the squirrels way to much! I talk about them all the time. For instance, have you noticed that they are super cute right now because they are all so fat? They look so happy! Even the one with only half a tail.
They seem a little less crazy right now too. They aren't running in front of the cars as much, they aren't letting the dogs chase them all the time, they all just seem fat and content. They know their purpose in life, and they have almost completed the cycle. It's like the end of the school year for them, they will be all tucked away and enjoying a winters sleep without a care in the world.
A few days ago, I hand fed one! He just came right up to me and sniffed through my grocery bags, so I opened a box of crackers and fed it to him. He just chilled and ate it while I unloaded my car. What is with that?? Why are they so content right now? Do they know something we don't? Could it be that while I curse out Firefox for getting rid of the side bar for favourite sites, they are plotting our demise? Or could it be that while I can't figure out who sings that song on the radio and no DJ ever wants to tell me the name of the song, the squirrels have figured out world piece and are applying it to the squirrel kingdom? Or maybe it could be that while I wait for the TTC, they are simply living life.
I think am actually jealous of the squirrels right now. Yikes! Perhaps I should start applying “squirrel philosophy” to my life. Screw traffic, It will do my bidding! I will have a killer diet to be bathing suit friendly by the end of winter, it's called sleep for 6 months. I will fascinate tourists, and fill their photo albums with my pictures. I will go wherever the fuck I want, and apologize to no one! Ya know the more I think about it, The more I think Squirrels have the right idea... Wow, I need a vacation!
